Tips For Managing A Moody Boss

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Watch For Patterns.

“Since spiking your boss’s coffee with mood-altering pharmaceuticals is not an option, watch for patterns, such as timing and triggers; see the storm coming; and avoid over-reacting yourself,” Taylor says.

If you’re having difficulty determining his or her pattern, open a line of communication between yourself and your boss’s administrative assistant (if they have one), she says. “The person closest to your boss will have the best reading of the current temperature—and the long-term forecast. Offer to help out your boss’s assistant whenever you can, to show sincere gratitude for the tip-offs you get.”


Limit Your Interactions If Their Mood Is Rubbing Off On You.
Many factors associated with moodiness are out of your control and it is very difficult to avoid emotional contagion, Parnell says. So if you can, temporarily limit your exposure to their mood swings in hopes that this is just a short term issue.

Keep Your Cool.

If you can’t avoid the boss, whatever you do, don’t inadvertently mimic this management style to other staff members, Taylor says. When your boss’s mood pendulum swings to the negative, be a sea of calm. Remind yourself that he’ll come back to center eventually. Show a relaxed, in-control demeanor yourself. “Lighten things through humor and distraction to ‘jam the system.’”

Make Sure It’s Not You.

“Don’t assume it’s just them,” Hockett says. “Make sure to also reflect on your own mood and performance. Are you upbeat yourself? Are you meeting expectations? Some bosses can be moody towards employees when they are not performing to their standards, even though the boss may not have communicated things clearly. So be proactive and figure things out on your own.”

Don’t Take It Personally.

If it is an occasional situation (and you’ve determined it’s not just you that they’re moody with), develop a way to bypass your boss’s bad mood, Kreamer says. “Take a walk, look at a favorite photograph, call a friend, and move on. If the moodiness is chronic, either set up time to discuss the situation directly with your boss–it may be that he or she is unaware of the impact of their behavior–or if that is not practical, talk to a trusted colleague or supervisor about what you can do to mitigate the damage to your psyche.”


Document Their Behavior.

Moodiness can turn vengeful, should your boss’s situation go from bad to worse, Parnell says. “So protect yourself by documenting their behavior, and your work product. One day you may be in a position where you’ll need to explain things to their boss, and without documentation, your words may fall flat.”


Don’t Trigger Mood Swings.
Once you figure out your boss’s mood triggers, don’t add fuel to the fire just to meet a deadline or get something done, Taylor says. “If tight turnaround time or bad news given out with no solution sends your boss’s demeanor into a nose-dive, take note, be patient and more strategic.”


Pick Meeting Times Carefully.

Figure out the best time to chat or check in with your boss, Hockett says. “Approaching your boss near the end of a sales quarter may not be wise, if they are often stressed during that period of time with trying to meet the sales goals. Ask or determine the right time to interact with them, so you avoid times when they might be moody.”


Don’t Confront The Boss During A Mood Swing.
“This is no time for a street fight,” Taylor says. “If your Darth Vader boss has swung to the dark side, don’t go on the offense with ‘Why are you suddenly so angry?’ If you have a good relationship with your boss, and all hell seems to have broken loose, you can certainly inquire about what’s wrong. But if it’s the all too common subtle mood swings, getting in the boss’s face is likely ill-fated. Better to stay out of the way until the clouds blow over, so you’re not a target.”

If The Problem Persists, Discuss It With Your Boss At The Right Time.

If the mood swings become a problem and starts to affect your work—don’t just complain to your colleagues and the higher ups; talk to the boss.

“While a persistent moody boss can be exasperating, you won’t make matters better by complaining to senior management, or even making an off-handed joke about it,” Taylor says. “Chances are it will circle back to your boss. Then you can watch a bad mood turn into a loud fireworks display.”

Instead, find the right time to sit down with your boss to discuss what’s going on. “You can’t be your manager’s therapist, but you can offer emotional support if you have a solid, open relationship,” she says. “If you have a strong foundation of mutual trust, you can become a business confidante, as long as it doesn’t interfere with your work. Your boss will learn to place greater trust and reliance on you. A system of reciprocal support can benefit you in your job and career.”

When moody mayhem strikes, use your own emotional intelligence to read between the lines, she adds. “By asking non-threatening questions, or knowing how to put your boss at ease, you’re likely to at least see that wild behavioral fluctuations have little to do with you. Then you can be part of an objective solution. Your office-mates will appreciate it, too,” Taylor concludes.

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